How to Measure Financial and Emotional Success in Your Empty Nester Years

When the last child leaves home, a new chapter begins—one that is full of opportunity, but often mixed with uncertainty. Many of the women I work with ask the same question in different forms: "How do I know if I’m doing this stage right?"

They’re not just talking about money. They’re talking about life.

Let me tell you about Jill—a story that reflects just how intertwined financial and emotional success truly are.

Jill came to me five years ago, at 47. She was newly single, her kids were almost out of the house, and she was finally ready to focus on herself. But she was torn. She had $15,000 in credit card debt spread across three cards—with interest rates of 25%, 29%, and 23%—and at the same time, she was eager to start investing. She had just inherited $10,000 and wanted to use it wisely.

Jill asked, “Where should I invest this? I feel like I’m behind.”

We ran the numbers together. I showed her that there was no investment—None—that could reliably earn more than the interest she was paying on her credit cards. In short: every month, her debt was quietly eating away at her financial future.

Together, we came up with a strategy. She used the $10,000 to pay off the two highest-interest cards. Then, she committed to using just the remaining lowest-rate card for monthly expenses—and began aggressively paying it down at $300/month (the same amount she had been paying on the sum of the minimum balance) in addition to covering her new charges in full.

It wasn’t flashy. But it was powerful.

It took her 18 months to pay off every penny. And once she did, she kept that $300 monthly habit—but now, it went straight into an investment account. Today, she’s building wealth intentionally, and her credit card is paid off every month.

That’s success. Not because of a market return or a dollar milestone—but because of clarity, confidence, and emotional peace.

1. Financial Success: Confidence in Your Numbers

For Jill, financial success didn’t begin with investing—it started with stopping the financial leaks. By eliminating high-interest debt and replacing it with a long-term strategy, she laid the groundwork for real growth.

Financial success isn’t about a magic number.

It’s about knowing what you have, understanding what you need, and making intentional choices that align with your values.

She didn’t wait for perfect timing. She acted with purpose—and that made all the difference.

2. Emotional Success: Purpose, Joy, and a Sense of Security

Jill’s financial turnaround sparked something deeper. She began visualizing a future where she wasn’t constantly stressed about money. She started journaling again. She joined a hiking group. She stopped second-guessing every financial decision and started celebrating her progress.

Emotional success in the empty nester years is about rediscovering who you are and what lights you up—without apology.

It’s about releasing shame around past decisions and embracing what’s possible next.

How Do You Measure Success?

If you're entering (or in) your empty nester years, here are a few reflection points:

• Financial: Do I know where I stand financially, and does that knowledge bring me peace?

• Emotional: Am I spending time doing things that energize me and align with my purpose?

• Holistic: Do I feel secure, valued, and free to explore what’s next?

If your answer is “not yet,” you’re not alone—and you don’t have to figure it out on your own.

Let’s build a future that feels as good as it looks on paper.

At Abaya Wealth Management, I help women turn this new phase into their best chapter yet—with a financial foundation and a vision for what’s next.

Ready to explore what success looks like for you? Let’s talk